Give Yourself Permission to be Happy
Worry and negative thoughts. We all have them. Sometimes we even let them take over our lives so bad that we become depressed, stressed, emotional, and often destructive.
I often have conversations with friends and colleagues about our hopes and dreams for life. However, when asked “why don’t you go for it?” I get a lot of confused stares that often lead to “it’s just not possible.” The reasons for that are “I can’t leave work,” “I have responsibilities,” or “it’s not that easy to drop everything and go.” Although that might be true, it is not absolute. I realized throughout some of these conversations that most of our decisions are based on our emotions. These include the desire to be liked and accepted by others, the need to be comfortable, and the fear of failure. However, if you take the emotional aspect out of it we would often follow a more directional path based on our own expectations.
I realized that I am also guilty of this. In the past, I have allowed myself to be taken down by my negative thoughts assuming that when something doesn’t go as planned all else is doomed. I remember when I lost my job I immediately cancelled several subscriptions that brought me joy including my gym membership. In hindsight it would have been better to keep the membership to maintain the continuity of health as well as boost my endorphin levels and keep me motivated to figure out my finances. Also in hindsight, everything worked out for the best and I still had plenty of savings to continue living the same lifestyle. Still, I couldn’t help but feel helpless and turn on survivor mode to cope with the negativity. I also realized that I was preventing myself from being happy in an already difficult situation.
"The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go" - Dodinsky
Sometimes our hearts and minds want something but we end up second guessing ourselves. It is really important to pay attention to the conversations you have with yourself. Negative self talk leads to unhappiness, stress, and a limited life. The voices in our heads would only get the best of us if we let them. After experiencing some major trials and tribulations in recent years I learned the importance of self care, self love, and allowing myself to be happy. That means really understanding my needs and how the choices I make will directly impact those needs. It starts with having self awareness and knowing what you want in life. Many people struggle with this for years and it really affects quality of life. One way to overcome this is to create a list of goals based on your needs and then a roadmap for how you will achieve those goals. Identify the resources you will need to set you on the right path. It is an ever evolving process that also teaches you to be less judgmental - with yourself and with others.
"It is not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It is necessary." Mindy Hale
Overall, I believe that life is such a beautiful thing. People, the world, experiences, all of it is so beautiful and it all depends on the lens through which you are seeing things. Give yourself permission to be happy - you’ve earned it and nobody can take that away from you. Your happiness is your internal compass that will guide you in the right direction. If something brings you joy do not forgo it and the reverse is true, if something does not bring you joy get rid of it immediately.
"Stay patient and trust your journey" - Anonymous
What are your thoughts? Have you given yourself permission to be happy? Leave a comment below!